Frozen Untold
by Fictiontastic
Summary: The untold parts of Disney's Frozen... Things that happened before. Things that happened after. Things that happened during. A fanfiction by Fictiontastic! Also available on: fictiontastic . tumblr . com and on wattpad . com / story / 23802134-frozen-untold
1. Newborn

**Frozen's story and original characters is a trademark of Disney 2013 all rights reserved.**

I will be using the characters, worlds and story for fanfictional purpose and won't be earning anything from it since these do not belong to me.

Please note that the story itself, which as not been taken from Frozen's story or "The snow queen" novel, is mine. They are a deviation from the original story, they are my words, they are under my copyright.

Any new characters created belong to me also.

All rights reserved.

PS: My first language is french, and even tho I am bilingual, I still don't write as well in english. Let me know if anything is worth correcting!

* * *

><p>I couldn't help but look at the snowstorm raging outside. I had to be distracted otherwise I would faint. The baby had just came out and she would just not cry. I walked around but nothing was helping. I looked down, nervous. A lady gave me a cup of tea but I couldn't drink it. Not in front of the bloody bed, not while I didn't know if everyone was okay.<p>

As soon as she yelled, I felt relief. The day had been so hard on my nerves. Well, not as hard as it's been on Idun's nerves. At some point, I really thought that she, the Queen, was going to die, that she was going to leave me here with this little girl. Even tho I am the great King Agdar, I believe no man can understand pain until he has seen a women give birth.

Suddenly, someone hands me the tiny baby. I refuse, I am scared that I will drop her. She is so small, I could break her bones by any misguided movement. Idun turns to me and nods, tired.

So I pick her up, not because I want to, but because my wife silently asked me too. I place her in my arms, that heir that is staring at me. And I see, in her blue eyes, a white sparkle flash trough. In that moment I knew, I knew she was special, I knew she was going to be a wondrous child, an amazing lady, a prodigious queen. I understood, that I was now a dad, and a king, and a husband. There are no words that could tell how much love flew in my veins right at that moment. That instant where, with her tiny cold hands, she grabbed my finger and held it tight. It felt like she was asking me to never abandon her. And who could do that to such a pretty little thing?

Indeed, I am scared. Indeed, I am terrified. But what I am sure of, is that the people from Arendelle will fall in love with her just as much as I just have. She stares at me, she sees trough my soul, **my little snow queen.**


	2. Capabilities

The jasmine tea that Agatha prepared for me felt just right. I needed it. Even though I gave birth almost a year ago, I still feel as if my body is out of sync with my thoughts.

-Would you like anything else, my Queen?

-No thank you Agatha, I say.

She bows and leaves, brushing the floor with her too long dress, and closes the door behind her. My gaze falls back to my daughter; Elsa. She has such a way of looking at you. It is as if she sees right trough you. And I am not crazy, Agdar thinks the same thing. We have talked about it just a couple of nights ago. Something special lives within her.

I feel privileged. I also feel like I am failing as a parent. Shouldn't I do more? Couldn't I do more? I don't know. My mother died when I was 12. She got killed by a hunter's lost arrow while we were picking up flowers for the guests that were supposed to attend our meal that evening. I know nothing about being a mother. I know nothing about children. So far, I keep telling myself that the child survived, and for some reason she seems to like me; her clumsy and reserved mother. I love her more than everything, more than my King, more than myself, more than the stars. There is no way to explain such a type of love. It's love that was created within yourself. It's love that is truer than anything. Unbreakable.

A knock on the door distracts me from my thoughts.

-Come in, I say.

-My lady? Says the King while pushing the door.

-Yes my love?

-Would it be a good time to talk?

-Of course, what is it?

Elsa smiles as she sees her father sitting in the chair next to mine. I put her on the floor, where she sits and plays with a doll that Agatha sowed for her. I turn around and sit straight, waiting for what Agdar has to say. He makes me nervous because he seems concerned.

-What is it? I repeat.

-Idun, I am afraid that…

He stops, with a shaky breath.

-Go on…

-I am afraid that Elsa might be more special than we thought. Have you seen her…capabilities?

-Capabilities? What do you mean Agdar?

He turns away and I see his face lit as he realizes how to explain it better.

-Look dear!

He points towards Elsa and right away I notice it. The doll and the princess are covered with what seems to be snow and a puddle of ice has formed on the floor right under her dress. Elsa moves her hips to try and slide from one side to the other. She has a big smile that keeps widening. I look at the King, no longer concerned but amazed. We remain silent for a long time. Until the princess decides to try to get up. For the past couple of weeks she has been trying to stand and could not do it for more than a minute. But something was not the same this time. She stood, without holding anything. She stood on ice.

The small part of motherly instinct I have makes me fall on my knees to catch her. I stop myself right on time, once I realize that she doesn't need to be caught. She is graceful. She is strong. And as if none of this was enough progress for one day, she makes a step towards me. I open my arms, hoping and crying. The king is now on the floor with us. Another step.

As soon as she steps off ice, she loses balance and falls on all fours.

We look at each other, the three of us, unable to explain anything that just happened and too happy to even question it. **Elsa is pure magic.**


	3. Lord Olaf

-Elsa...Mama is trying to read.

-Fluwies, she mumbles.

I pretend to close the book. She gets up and the snowflakes that had been falling for the past two minutes disappear as fast as they came. She walks towards me with a sad face. I bend over so that our faces are at the same level and ask her:

-Do you want to know the end of the story or not?

She nods. I softly pinch her nose and smile. I sit back and re-open the book at the page that my finger was holding. Elsa walks back to her doll and sits on a pillow. She is eager to know what the ending of the story is, the ending of this reading I've been doing for the past four days.

-Where were we? ...Ha! here it is.

_"The princess told the old goblin that she would not kill him for what he did. Instead, with the help of her uncle Sam the wizard, she would make him prisoner of the kingdom. He could not go trough the limits of this land. That way, he would have to face all the evil things he did, he would have to see the people that his actions affected, he would have to live with himself and that was the worst punishment._

_-You can't, the goblin says._

_-Of course she can, says a man that now stands beside Princess Helena._

_-Who are you, says the greenish man._

_-I am Lord Olaf, the Princess's fiancé._

_-You have no say in what happens to me, the little man responds with rage._

_-Enough, says Helena. I have already decided and you won't change my mind, Goblin._

_Seeing that nothing would change her mind, the green goblin remained silent. That same evening, he got escorted to a very small appartment near the stables, where, he would have to work hard to earn his food. Helena and Olaf went back to the castle seperatly._

_The next morning, Lord Olaf knocked at her door._

_-Helena, my love._

_-Olaf, dear, you are not supposed to be here, we are not supposed to see each other._

_-I know, Princess. I only needed to hear your voice._

_He hesitated and added:_

_-Do you think it would be against the traditions if you would open the door and just give_

_me your hand so I could hold it a second? We won't see each other._

_-Sure._

_She grinned as she opened the door and held her hand up so that it met his fingers. They entangled them together. That day was their last day apart from each other. From now on, they would be together forever._

_-I love you, Olaf says._

_-I love you more, says Helena._

_THE END"_

Elsa giggles and claps noisily. I beam, pleased by her reaction to that story that my own mother read to me when I was young.

Something cold touches my hand and I know, before even looking, that the flurries are falling again. With a big grin for Elsa, I level myself to her bright eyes and I add:

-I love Fluwies.


	4. Winter Wonderland

By that time, my parents had made sure that the servants were not letting a word out of the Castle concerning my powers. I remember my dad telling me that it was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. The thing which could lead people to want to hurt me. He said it was important to keep it from anyone outside the Castle.

Even though I didn't go out the gates much (only with mama), I was being very cautious. I was only two, but the thought of people taking me away from my family had scared me so much that I didn't disobey on that part. Ever.

One day, one of my farthest souvenir, my parents closed the doors of the ballroom. Leaving only me and them alone. That is when my dad said:

-Now you can show us, Elsa. You can show us all.

I remember thinking. _What is "all"?_ But then, I just did what I knew I was capable of, assuming that this is what they wanted, what I understood. Snow fell, ice covered the floor up to the base of the walls. I threw snowballs that appeared to come from my heart but they came from my joined hands. One of them hit my dad's shoulder. My mom laughed and he looked at her, amused. She grinned while she picked snow up and shaped it roundly. She tried hitting his chest but it hit his leg instead. He ran to her and she tried to flee but she wasn't fast enough. I remember my giggles filling the immense room, like music that shaped that little world I had created for just us three. I laughed and laughed and bigger snowflakes started falling. The atmosphere looked magical. A winter wonderland. My dad was still holding my mom in the air by her waist, twirling and dancing. After a while, he let her slowly back to her feet and kissed her on her nose before skating towards me in circles. I threw him a snowball and missed. He laughed and bent down to shape one to throw at me. Mama was laughing, but then, suddenly, she fell on her knees.

Papa turned around when he saw my face. More and more snow started to fall and the ice thickened all over the room, it expanded also. I assumed that she had eaten bad meat, that this is why she let it all out. I assumed she would be okay, but I was still scared. As soon as mom got up, she said she was fine and they looked at each other. I did not know, at that time, what it meant. But now I know. They knew right away. **I was going to be a big sister.**


	5. Blood Spill

She placed my hands on her round belly and I attempted to tickle her instead. She laughed and then said:

-Elsa, if you want to feel the baby moving, your hands have to stay in place.

She was supposed to give birth very soon according to the wisewomen. I obeyed and just a second after, something hit the inside of my palm. I removed it fast, surprised. I smiled, holding my hand and looking at it.

Mama grabbed it again and placed it gently on her belly. She nodded softly with a loving smile.

A few weeks later, Agatha was holding me because I was trying to run to the other room. Mama was crying and yelling. I did not understand. I didn't want her to feel this way. I wanted to break anything that was doing this to her. She covered my hears in an attempt to keep me from hearing the awful and scary suffering sounds. After a bit, a long and steady scream came from the other room. Something I have never heard before, something that made me think that mama was gone forever.

I managed to untie myself from Agatha's arms and I ran towards the door. I slammed it open and lift my hands in the air, ready to attack whatever had just done this to my mother. Yes, I was only 3, but I remember that this moment felt like I was an adult, a soldier, a guardian angel. Papa was there, standing at the end of the bed, which was covered in blood. He turned around and I saw that he was holding something. I approached, a little reassured by his smile fighting trough his tears of what seemed to be joy. He bent down and I saw it. The baby, the pink and blue baby. It…She...looked at me with her big bright innocent eyes. I instantly loved her. I loved her so much and I knew she was the most precious thing I had. The thing I would have to take care of the most.

-Her name is Anna, papa said.

I could only nod, slowly bringing my arms down, no longer needing my powers. Tears made their way to my eyes and I let them out. Then, I remembered Mama. I turned around swiftly and I saw her half asleep, laying on her side. I walked to her and my face was at the same height as hers. She smiled and said:

-My big girl Elsa. I love you.  
>She touched my cheek with her fragile and cold hand. Papa walked near me, to show Mama the pretty baby once again. She was too weak to hold her. Turns out she was too weak for everything, because just a second later, she screamed again and the wisewomen ran to the end of the bed again.<p>

-Blood spill! she yelled.

Another woman ran to the bed and turned mom on her back. Papa went to get Agatha and she pushed me out of the room as the door closed on them. I hit the doors with my hands, so many times.** So many times…**


	6. Fighting for attention

Since Anna was born, I had stopped using my powers. I decided that it would be a secret because I didn't want to share that with her. It was already enough that she stole my parents and that she chewed on all my dolls and wooden toys, she would not have the satisfaction of seeing our Wonderland. I remember being so happy and excited about her birth. When our eyes met and she gazed at me as if I were a shiny object that she wanted more than everything. I loved her so much back then. But that was before Mama and Papa started shouting more at me. They were always tired and on edge. Mama was stubborn and she didn't want any help with Anna. I assume she was the same when I was born too. This made her tired and I was scared that she would leave us again. She almost died once and that was enough for me. I wanted her to rest and even with all my protests, they didn't want to listen to my little three year old voice. What did I know about children, that is what Agatha told me once. It was mean and she got punished for it. Mama made sure she would never talk to her princess like that again. Everyone was on edge and I felt like I was left aside. All of this for Her, that little brat. She had just started eating real food last week and she is already spitting it to my face when I dare stand next to Mama while she feeds her. I have started getting less hugs, less kisses. Am I already supposed to be all grown up? One night, I held my favorite doll, the one with a heart stitch on it, and I talked to her:

-Do you think Mama and Papa don't like me anymore? I mean, they never come to Wonderland anymore…they never ask for it. It's only about Anna, Anna, all the time.

I held the doll in the air while I was laying in bed. I shaked it a bit, thinking it might move and give me the answers I needed, but she stayed silent so I threw her across the room and held my pillow instead.

A month later, Anna wouldn't stop yelling in the middle of the night. I could not bare it anymore. The past weeks had been awful for me, I got stuck with Agatha, whom I still hated because of what she said. I wanted my mother and father but they were always too busy. I hoped I wouldn't grow into hating Anna, because somehow I couldn't. Thing is, I was tired of her getting all the attention. I was tired of feeling like I only existed trough her now. I got up and walked to her room, expecting Mama to be there, holding her and trying to make her feel better, but I was wrong, Mama was not here yet. I walked towards her little crib and she kept crying and crying. At some point I lost patience and lifted my hands up. A light glow illuminated my hands as I was about to do something awful, something I would regret all my life. But then, something magical happened, Anna stopped crying for the first time in days. She looked at me trough the bars of the crib. She stared at my hands and then, she giggled. My eyes widened and a smile grew on my face.

-Oh so you like that? I say, while moving my glowing hands in a circle motion.

More giggles. I grin. **Suddenly, it's Wonderland again…**


	7. Happy Birthday

They tried many times to make her stand on ice, just like they did for me. They also tried many times to make her powers show up. But she was one year old today and not walking, barely saying any words, and had no apparent signs of any power. I was disappointed and somehow happy. The fact that she had no powers meant that I was alone…but also that I was unique and special. She loved it when I made snow fall. She loved it even more when I made icy slides appear out of nowhere. Of course, I would have to be careful and make sure to catch her when she'd get to the bottom, but she was not scared. She trusted me.

The plan for today, was starting with new dresses. Mine was blue, as always, and Anna's was green. This made her skin look like she was glowing with happiness. Her short copper hair had just started being long enough to hold a very tiny ponytail on top of her head. Then, mom and dad brought us to the kitchen, making us choose between a variety of cakes. I had to help since Anna was not really fully aware of what she liked yet, but I still went with something that I knew she would love: Chocolate. All chocolate. Every time Agatha would make her eat breakfast, she would end it with a very small piece of chocolate. Of course, nobody knew about this except me, otherwise the maid would be in trouble. I grew into liking her again. I wouldn't say I forgave her, but I did get over it. After this, we were brought to the ballroom, where a lot of food was piled up in different shapes to make it seem like they were live animals. Anna's eyes were shining with joy. Papa nodded towards me:

-Yes? I ask.

-Wonderland would be beautiful with all these animals standing around, don't you think?

He grinned and Mama smiled too. I raised my hands up and flurries filled up the air. Falling quite fast and soon covering the whole floor. No longer than five minutes later, there was enough snow to play in it. Mama put Anna on her feet but she instantly fell on her behind. She giggled, looking at the snowflakes that were clinging to her. She opened her mouth trying to catch them with her tongue and we all laughed because of the faces she was making. I mean, she knew about my powers since she was born, she and I played a lot in the snow, but it's the first time that she seemed to be really trying to interact with it.

I went to the food table and grabbed an apple to eat it. Papa and Mama kept trying to make Anna stand up but she wouldn't. I was staring at the scene from afar and started chewing slowly until a point where I stopped because of a thought that might be the solution. Suddenly I had an idea. I dropped the apple to the floor and moved closer to Anna but still far enough. I twirled my hands around, making circle motions that were creating a storm in front of me. The snow at my feet got lifted from the floor and started moving in circle, creating a circular snowball that kept growing. Then it dropped heavily on the floor. I repeated the motion three times until I saw the shape of a snowman in front of me. I went back to the table, grabbed a carrot and pulled two twigs that were holding something from the lion food sculpture, which instantly fell as soon as I did. Then after picking up a couple of raisins, I ran towards the snowman. Anna had already started looking at the stacked balls, intrigued. Mama and Papa seemed to wonder what I was trying to do. I placed the elements on his face and body and the sculpture looked just like a human. Well, not really, but the basic shapes of it, as you would do for any regular snowman. I stepped behind it and grabbed the two twigs, moving them up and down as if it was waving to Anna.

-My name is Olaf, and I like warm hugs! I say with a voice that is far from being mine.

That is when, under the admiring and grateful eyes of our parents, Anna got up. **That is when she made her first steps.**


	8. Crickets Regrets

-Anna! Wait, I said while urging her to come back beside me.

We were standing in a dark corner of the kitchen, ready to drop the crickets that we had found outside in the chef's soup.

-But they are moving, she said with a disgusting voice, staring at her closed hands.

-I'll make it quick. I will make Agatha call the chef, saying I am hungry and want to speak with him. You will have only a couple of second.

-What if we get caught?

She looks at me with her big bright eyes, scared to death. We had played pranks before and we were a good team. She might be small, but that was an advantage for us because she could sneak anywhere. Not that I was very tall either, we are not that far apart in height.

-We won't get caught, I say, and if we do, I will tell them it's my fault, I promise.

I gesture towards her for a pinky swear and she smiles. We nod in agreement. I go back by the door that we came in, leaving Anna crouched beside a counter. As soon as I get out, I go to the ballroom, where Agatha had been cleaning for the past hour.

-Agatha, I am hungry, please. Could I see the chef with your permission?

She looks at me, suspicious but nods and takes me to the main entrance of the kitchen.

-I will go get him, she says, you wait.

I obey and just a second after, they are in front of me.

-Yes Princess, what can I do for you?

-I am hungry and would like to have one of your omelettes Mr. Chef.

I always knew his name was not Mr. Chef. Not that I knew his real one, but I liked to call him that because it made him smile, every time. As if the fact that I recognized him as being a good cook, as having a title, was enough to make him happy. I smiled back while he turned around to go prepare my meal. I thanked Agatha and ran back to the other door where Anna was already outside, waiting for me. We sat in the middle of the room and waited until we heard a scream. Chef walked outside the kitchen with a big spoon looking around and then pointing at Agatha who had just run back in the room to see if everything was okay.

-YOU! You put these vile insects in my soup! You tried to kill the King and Queen!

I stepped up and walked to them.

-They are not toxic, I said, they can't kill you if you eat them.

They both stared at me for a couple of seconds. Agatha was angry and Chef was calmer but still burning inside. He adjusted his posture and walked away with a superior sigh. Agatha followed him after glaring at me and Anna. I turned around and Anna was laughing.

-It's not funny Anna, he thinks Agatha did it.

She instantly stopped. I was worried.

With good reasons. A couple of hours later, the maid got called by our parents for a discussion. From what I managed to hear trough the door, she would not be paid for today's duties because of her lack of seriousness. I felt bad, terribly bad. That evening, I went to bed and waited for Agatha to come read us a story. Instead, she came slamming the door open and right away she held me by the shoulders and shaked me violently. Anna was screaming from her bed across the room.

-You little brat, you will pay for what you did! She said.

Then, she slapped me just as Mama entered the room. I held my palm to my cheek because it hurt a lot. Suddenly I didn't feel so bad. She didn't deserve that I felt guilty, not anymore. That woman had every right to be angry, I was angry at myself for what I had done to her. I was even ready to give her a piece of jewelry of mine, to pay for her day that I screwed up. Now, couldn't care less about her. I looked at her blankly as Mama rushed to hold me tight. She pointed the door and yelled:

-GET OUT! Right now, before I call a guard to remove what you call a head from your body.

The maid ran away, shocked. Anna came to sit beside me and we hugged. That is when I decided I would never play pranks again, that's when I decided that fun would only take place when I was alone with Anna or with my parents. **That's when I understood how rage changes people.**


	9. Portraits

Mama was still concerned about what Agatha did to me. Even if it was seven months ago, she still didn't trust our maids and butlers. Our new maid Andrea was very sweet. She was one of the youngest maids we had, maybe sixteen years old I guess? She played with us gently and invented games that Anna and me both liked very much. She made time fly because she was fun being with. It was quite a change from the mood swings of Agatha. Today we had planned to go horseback riding but the rain fell heavily on the castle and I was tired of hearing Anna complain so I went to my room and decided to look at old portraits documented in an album. I sat down with it on my knees and looked at myself smiling while holding daddy, jumping on pillows, trying to catch a cat. There were so many drawings and portraits of me and they were all signed by Mama's hand. I wondered if Anna had as many of her in her album. Suddenly, a knock on the door surprised me.

-Go away Anna! I said, sure it was her.

The door knob turned anyways and Papa walked in.

-Are you okay Elsa? Andrea said you were sad.

A sudden burst of anger filled my brain.

-I am not sad, I just hate rain. It is wet and the thunder scares me. I admitted shyly.

He crouched to peek at what I was doing and then sat down beside me, gesturing for me to sit on his lap with the album. I gladly did and he flipped the pages with me, commenting each portraits with the stories related to them. I giggled when I saw him stuck with a piece of candy in his hair and me laughing behind him. Mama must have had a lot of fun doing this one. He tickled me so I fell on my back, barely containing my laughter. Once I sat back, he flipped the last page and there was one portrait that I had never noticed.

-Who is this, daddy?

He sighed before explaining:

-The lady on the left is my sister, Marina. The man on the right, who is holding you in his arms is Leonardo Persinette, her husband.

-What about the baby? I urge to say.

-The little blond baby girl on Marina's lap is your cousin, but she got kidnapped a couple of days after that photo was taken, they still haven't found her.

I bring my hands up to my mouth, covering the breath I sucked in, realizing how cruel the world can be. I touched the image, the smiling baby's face that looked a bit like mine.

-What was her name? I ask.

**-Rapunzel. He says.**


	10. Selfless

_Hi guys, sorry for not posting in a while… I got sick and then my son got sick…..so everyone got sick…. *BUY ALL THE MEDS*….. *SLEEP ALL THE DAY* …lollllll Anyways… should be back to once a week unless something else comes up again…. (please no)…_

...

That part right here happens right after they went to see the trolls after little Anna got struck by Elsa the first time and all memories of magic are erased. Enjoy.

...

I have been crying for two days. What that troll said meant that I could never be myself anymore. Never. Mama kept knocking at my door, begging me to open it so we could talk but I needed space. I decided to keep it locked. Even tho I felt lonely. I couldn't believe what I had done. I kept staring at my hands, wondering "why me?". I practiced, I tried freezing and un-freezing some books from my library, but every single time I ended up freezing half the room. At one point, I threw all the books across my bed, leaving pages flying slowly towards the ground. A page fell at my feet and I saw the drawing. That little girl, Rapunzel was alone. I was here, in my room, my parents trying to help me. And all I could do was be stubborn and complain that I was lonely and sad. Not once I thought that some people might have it worst. Some people, like her, were kidnapped or even killed. Some fight anger every day. Some get too sick and die. I am a Princess who has uncontrollable powers and an immense amount of people willing to help her figure it out. How did I become so selfish? Or when have I not been? As the realization settled in, I dropped the little drawing and I ran to the door to unlock it. I swung it open and saw the most heartbreaking vision I would ever see. Mama was laying on the floor, her head resting on Papa's lap while he was playing with her hair. He turned to look at me and made Mama sit, her eyes glittering from crying too much. They then stood on their knees and opened their arms, in which I ran. That hug probably lasted for twenty minutes before I had the courage to get back to a normal standing position. I twirled my fingers together and said:

-Mama, Papa, I want to be me, I want to learn to control it, I want to learn to be selfless and serious, I want to learn to be a Queen, I want to be a good person…

-But honey, you are…

I lifted my hand, stopping mom from continuing her elaborate description of me being fantastic and continued:

-I will do everything that I can and that I have to do to learn how to control and manage this. Meanwhile, I will not see Anna and I will remain in my room to keep people safe.

-Elsa! Papa said. We love you the way you are, you do not need to do this, we will figure it out.

By that point, Mama was crying, holding her hands to her cheeks while daddy hugged her tightly.

-No Papa. This is how I intend to repay for what I did to Anna. Also, so that it never happens again to anyone else. **Will you, my parents, the King and Queen, help me become a miracle instead of a monster?**


	11. Backing away

I wish I could say we made progress with my control of the whole magic thing, but we didn't. If anything, it's worst than it was. Everything that I touched instantly froze so Papa gave me special thick white gloves that I was expected to wear all the time. They don't bother me that much except for the fact that I can't feel anything. It took some time to adjust to it but I learned to be patient in the past two years while I was in my room studying old tales in research for a solution or at least some help. Anna still came from time to time. Mostly when it was snowing, she would knock at my door asking if I wanted to play or build a snowman. I never answered though. I kept saying to myself "Conceal. Don't feel. Don't let it show." and it helped me to keep her safe. Papa and I came up with this idea together, something I could think of or say that would remind me why I am doing this and why it's imperative to do so. I feel like my childhood has stopped when I chose to occupy mainly my room. It, my childhood, has gone to some other land since I became "too mature for my age", like Mama says. She has taken this whole thing harder than I did. I assume that as a mother, it's a great pain to see that your child has to grow up without living life to its full extent. She does come to me every night to read stories and act with them in an theatrical manner. She even includes me and Papa sometimes. That is the moment of the day that I like the most. The one I look forward to every day. In the morning, I usually practice without gloves to try and control something or search for a trigger. Most of these moments are spent with Papa or Andrea but they always stay far from me in case something happens. In the afternoon, I sometimes go outside on a balcony that my dad reserved strictly to me and that is just across the corridor. If not, I go to our gigantic library and pick up tales to study. I have read 68 books so far this year and still haven't found any that had this sort of magic described in it. I was tired, even exhausted I would say. But I had a reason to do it. I wanted to live but the condition was to keep others safe and I was determined to honor that promise even tho I seemed to be running out of time. At least I didn't run out of life…yet.

That night, my sleep was agitated and I was awaken by the hardness of my pillow when I turned on my back. I quickly opened my eyes and raised myself on one elbow. Instinctively, seeing what I had done, I raised my hand to my mouth and started crying. I had frozen my pillow and parts of my bed…WITH my gloves on. My sobs were getting louder and my parents burst into the room a couple of minutes later. I froze a part of the wall in the process of moving further away from them. They tried to hug me but I backed away.

**-I'm scared, it's getting stronger!**


	12. Friennemy

Mom and dad still came every day. I was happy to see them but I was longing their touch. I missed being held tight, the feeling of being safe as long as I was sitting on mom's lap. I missed everything so much it was unbearable. The one thing that I stopped looking for was Anna. I started pretending that she moved away a year ago. It was too sad for me to see her trough my window, running around outside. Or to see her pass in the corridor. I would spy on her often back then. Partially jealous of her simple life but mostly missing our complicity, missing a sister that could've helped me get through all of this if only she knew. Anna herself had stopped knocking at my door lately. At some point I felt like she would never give up. Until, finally one day she did. It broke my heart and I froze my room.

I saw Anna from my private balcony yesterday. It was one of the rare times that I happened to see her. She always turned to look if I was there so I hid from her view. When she continued on her path, I noticed how much she had changed in the last year. Her long hair were floating gracefully on her back. She usually wore them up or in braids but today seemed different. Though she had nothing graceful about her because she was so clumsy, she still looked grown up. She looked…like a lady, like the one who should be queen one day. Her hips swayed in a different manner. Her eyes seemed to glitter under the sun. Her lips had become fuller. Her shape had changed to more curves than she used to have. I walked back to my room, towards my mirror and looked at myself, all covered up. My clothes were pretty and flattering but I didn't have that kind of attitude. I had become introverted trough all of this. I hated myself more and more every day because I couldn't be normal or at least pretend to be. I couldn't control my own powers so I couldn't control who I was. The easiest way to do so was to stay away from everyone, locked in my room, reading about fairy tales. I had read most of our library's books throughout the years so I was mostly reading for entertainment now. My favorite ones included strong female characters such as one where the girl steps up to her mother because she didn't want to marry the guy that they picked for her, she wanted love, real love.

All these books made me wonder about these sort of things. I didn't have the courage to ask mom or Andrea because I wanted them to think I was still searching for a solution to my "problem". I had started drawing with mom, she showed me how, she gave me her personal tricks and I was surprised to see that I was as good as her for that. My hands ended up drawing boyish faces that didn't exist. Inspired by characters, by personalities of literary Princes, I drew many of them. I let myself imagine that one day I could live peacefully with someone who would love me beyond what seems to be the main part of me. Someone who wouldn't care, who would understand. Someone who could help me build a family. Even if that meant I couldn't be Queen or even Princess anymore… At this point, nothing really mattered in my life. I had learned to survive without the love that I needed or at least without reach of it. I couldn't touch my parents. I couldn't see my sister. I couldn't have friends. I was scared of the maids getting hurt. I had become friends with myself only. A friend and an enemy whom were both living in the same space. **In my frozen heart.**


	13. Butterflies

One evening, while everyone was probably asleep, I went to the library to grab a couple more books for the upcoming week. The doors were not even open yet that I could already smell the ink and magic of each pages begging for me to read them once again. That is when the door opened and I almost fell on my behind. Of course the whole hallway froze up by the time I got my balance back. The gloves were indeed helping. But they were no help when I was scared.

I lift my eyes and gaze at the person in front of me. A young boy, about my age, is standing there, completely mortified.

-P...Princess Elsa, I… I'm sorry.  
>His green eyes fell to the ground shyly and he lent a hand to me. I pushed it away quickly but then he added, his eyes staring into mine:<p>

-I'm not scared of you, Princess.

For a second I was speechless. Actually, I was completely baffled, not only by his looks, but by the way he looked at me. It was as if he was seeing me as the person I really was, not as the monster that everyone else is scared of. So after a moment, I gave him my covered hand which he held tightly all the way to the inside of the library. He left the cart he was pushing behind us so I asked:

-Are…are you new here?

He laughed. A pretty laugh, a young innocent boyish laugh. One like I never heard before. My heart skipped a beat but I pinched myself. Do not do this to yourself. You'll only end up hurting yourself, or worse, him.

-No my lady, I have been working here for the past 6 months. Haven't you noticed that the book selection had started to change?

-Oh, so you are the one who took Prince Elias away from me. I say with a smirk.

He walks around while I switch my balance from one feet to the other. Then, he picks up a wooden ladder and climbs onto it. He comes back down with a heavy book and gives it to me with a smile.

-The cold Prince. He says.

-You read it? I ask while hugging the book closely to my heart.

-Of course. I have read most of these actually.

Suddenly my cheeks felt warm so I looked down at the book, pretending to check if it suffered any damage.

-I take very good care of these. He adds.

-I see that.

I take a chance and lift my eyes up a bit but he is starring right into mine so I back down again.

-Could I ask a question my lady?

-You can call me Elsa and yes you can.

I tried imagining anything he could want to ask me. But it all came back to the main question I always got asked: "Are you controlling it?". The fact was that I wasn't. My smile faded but he lifted up my chin with his hand.

-I'm sorry if this is inappropriate but I'd rather see your eyes lady Elsa.

I nod in agreement, trying to maintain myself somewhat proper.

-Why do you think that everyone refers to you as a Monster? I mean, yes you have powers that you cannot control very well for now, but aren't you just a normal teenage girl like Anna?

A burst of jealousy flooded my veins but he quickly calmed me down by continuing.

-I mean aren't you tired of being by yourself? Aren't you ever going to hang out with people who'd like that?

Did he mean to make me feel bad? Or was he actually trying to make me feel lonelier? What was the point of this?

-Show me one and then we will talk. I say sarcastically.

-A person who would like to get to know you? He laughed. Well you have one right in front of you and you are still ignoring the fact he his interested in joining you for activities. Perhaps, reading.

I looked at his sincere eyes peeking through mine and my smile widened but quickly faded.

-It's too dangerous. I cannot guarantee anyone's safety. For all I know, I could struck you just by missing a step on this ladder.

-That's an accident, I could also break my leg while falling from it. He says with a huge grin.

I blink at him. Speechless. His green eyes are hypnotizing.

-What's your name? I ask while looking at his dark brown hair that seem to be going anywhere but straight.

-I'm Alexei, but you can call me Alex, or even Al if you're really lazy.

His face turned red.

-I'm sorry, I'm being totally improper.

-It's fine. I say, grinning shyly.

He smiles and turns around towards the rows of books. He picks up a tiny one and walks back to me. I sit on the floor, hoping nobody sees us together or he might lose his job.

-Let's start by reading this one. Or re-reading actually. And then we'll talk. Alright?

-What does that one have in particular?

-It's my favorite. He adds with a smile.

He then puts one of the seat covers on the floor, helps me down and then sits right beside me. So close that our legs are touching. **I'm shivering and it's not because of the cold.**


	14. Love

I was seeing him more and more and we had made my room our new meeting point. It was easier this way. Perhaps I have not paid attention before, or he was, indeed, making sure to cross my path more often. I had to face it. My feelings for him had grown into a deep friendship. He seemed to be the only one who'd understand me. The only one that likes me for me. The thought makes me blush. Does he like me? Surely not. He told me he wanted to be my friend, that's all he said. The clock appeared broken because the time went by so slow. Eventually when it finally reached 9pm, I heard the familiar knock on my door. He was here. I got up and tried to keep a straight face while I opened the door. As expected Alexei was there, except that the usual books that he held were replaced by a bunch of flowers. My heart skipped a beat and even though I didn't know what it was to feel hot, in that moment I realized that this was probably how I looked. My cheeks were certainly tainted red. He held me the flowers while bringing his head down. Shy? He was shy? Impossible. Alex had proven to me in the past couple of weeks that he was the opposite of shy. He got trough my shell so easily. He broke it without even trying. All he had to do was be his awesome self. I laughed, I cried. We read, we talked. We shared fears and nightmares. Today, we were about to share our, apparently mutual, love. Butterflies flew right out of my chest. I felt as if it was going to explode. I felt as if I was lighter than a feather. I took the flowers and put them down gently on the table beside the door. Then, I decided to let go. To just let it all go, forget everything. I took Alex's hands and brought him close to me as I closed the door. As I stared into his eyes, I knew he was hoping for this too. Who knows for how long we had both been too shy to say anything. Thank god he had given me these flowers. This innocent gesture that meant so much more than it actually is. I tentively moved my lips closer to his. Searching the approval in his eyes. He closed them and I could see the hint of a smile forming on his face. Our lips sealed shut and the stress of the first touch went away as fast as it came. Alex wasn't freezing. Alex wasn't dying. Alex was kissing me. Alexei, was mine and only mine. His hands moved down my back and moments later we stopped because we knew it was too soon for anything else to be possible. He sat on my bed, holding the back of his neck as if he was pulling his face down, his eyes down. He was certainly blushing, I could see it on his ears peaking out of his hair. I sat beside him and we both fell on our backs, staring at the ceiling. I put my hand in his hair and started playing with the small strands that I have been wanting to touch for so long. He moved on his side and put his head over my heart.

-Your heart beats fast.

-Yours too. I say while placing my other hand on his chest.

-I really like you Elsa, I'm glad you feel the same way. I was scared of your reaction.

-You…you were scared?  
>My stomach clenched.<p>

-No no! Not like that. I was, scared you wouldn't like me back. That's all.

His smile widened when he saw the relief in my eyes. Then his gaze became playful and he reached my lips with his again. He would be my prince someday, I would make sure of it. **This, was love. **


	15. (AN: Hiatus)

Hiatus

About this story… It is on hold for now. I will be back at the end of January to write this. I am too busy for now and I'm in another fandom that takes a lot of space in my life and I can't seem to manage both for the time being. Also, I got this review from an anon:

"If Elsa was the one dating Alex...it's a terrible idea.  
>Elsa doesn't like like anyone. She can't. It's better if she's single. I think that Disney's trying to prove that you don't always need a true love. And love can come in different forms like siblingfamily love and friendship. Plus Anna is the one with true love. And have you forgotten that Elsa has powers. When she gets nervous her powers go out of control. What if the guy kissed her? She might loose control over her powers and freeze the guy. This is why she's better of single. If you ever make a fanfiction, please please please keep Elsa single. :-l"

May I just spoil you all since this person seems pissed about this….. Alex is not there to stay….the reason why he was there…..is the fact that when Elsa tells Anna "what do you know about love" …in the movie. It's because she knew love…ONCE. And she knows how much it hurts. Basically….it was to strengthen her hatred towards the whole love thing, that she doesn't believe in it. Which was necessary to go to the next few steps of my fics…

And well… since I'm the author, I'll do as I please, but before you write things like this people, please consider that there might be a good reason for this to be there and it might all be planned.

ANYWAYS on a more positive note, I wish you all happy holidays and I'll write the rest of the fic soon!

Have a good day guys

l happy holidays and I'll write the rest of the fic soon!


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